Our Mission

Here in this place, our one mission is to classify, to distinguish, the Dateable from the Undateable.

Monday, February 6, 2012

Sexy Inventors

We're back!! We know you missed us. Confess. Well after that weirdness, let's get on with the point of this post and talk about some attractive/sexy inventors!

First up, Thomas Edison.


We found Thomas Edison to be......Questionable. Confused as to how we couldn't decide? Read on and discover!



Didn't know he was so hot, huh? Neither did we until this blog. So not only is he brilliant, but he is also attractive. Cha-ching!



He was born in Milan.....Ohio. Hah! you thought he was Italian. Giving another shoutout to my midwest boys! Wha-What!! Only unlike Drew Carey, he's cool. He's the youngest of seven children and a school drop out. When he was a teenager, he saved a three year old from a run away train. Booyah. Now that is BA.

The thing that Thomas Edison is most famous for is the invention of the lightbulb. He also had many other inventions such as the nickle-iron batteries, carbon microphone, and the accidental phonograph. How do you invent something on accident??

One interesting story is about Mr. Edison and Topsy the elephant. Topsy, was up for execution for smooshing people, not the Jersey Shore kind. So instead of hanging her, they decided to let Mr. Edison use her as a wacked out science experiment. He used alternate currents to kill Topsy. So smart, creative, attractive, animal killer.... C-C-C-C-Combo Breaker!!!

If you REALLY want to see it, click
HERE.... you sicko...

This is not the first animal that he killed however. He killed multiple cats and dogs because they were easy to steal from his neighbors yard*. He also got a couple cows and horses too.

The most famous quote from Thomas Edison is "Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration." So basically, Homeboi stank*. But he was brilliant while doing so.

Good

1. He's a hero.
2. Kinda smart.

Bad

1. He electrocuted aminals.
2. He was a smelly, smelly man.







We were going to give you more, but then it was too hard soooooo......goodnight! See you later, deuces!




*The events in this blog may or may not be true. Except for the elephant. That is definately true 'cuz we have footage.