DBZ Dateable Saga Part 2

Last time on our adventures with the Dateable and NonDateables of Dragon Ball Z, we left off after discussing two of our main characters. Now, my precious little sugarplums, we move on to the stoic Tien Shinhan....

We found Tien Shinhan to be....DATEABLE.

He's bald and serious. But that's okay. Bald men are shmexxy. He's like Vin Diesel or Bruce Willis. Even though he cares for a small man-child...like, a really strange attachment....what are they to each other? How did they meet? Is Chiaotzu competition? That may be the one flaw in this situation. Can you imagine a dinner date? You tryna get to know the man, you get caught in a freaky situation where you end up being the third wheel. Besides that, Tien is all good. Remember when Launch tried to date him, and he didn't care? That was awesome. He doesn't mind if you're a little bit psycho...or a lot psycho...just be your crazy self who likes to shoot people and has a serious personality disorder. Besides, who knows, maybe if you were at least resembling normal, he might actually like you more! Also, Tien is just so hard-core! To win a game, he flippin' broke somebody's leg. Dang, if he did that just to win a competition, imagine what he would do for you.

Alright, let's break it down for you, point system style.

Dateable Points:

1. bald and shmexxy


2. doesn't mind crazies


3. he is TOTALLY hard core

Undateable Points:

1. Creepy man-child attachment

So for those of you who need help that's 3 good points versus 1... interesting bad point. Which is demonstrated by this snazzy graph:

And there you have it my dear sugar blossoms. plain and simple.

Next up, we have a small creature with red cheeks. No, not Pikachu... It's Chiaotzu!!

We found Chiaotzu to be UNDATEABLE.

He's a little creepy....wait did I say little? I meant a buttload. Like he just stares at people. And has he ever had a change in expression the whole time? the WHOLE series? I think not. He only has one hair. Why just ONE? Shave that sucker off...although that would be easy maintenance...wouldn't even have to brush it. Plus, there are some troubling questions that one would have to find out the answers to before they started dating him. For one, what is he? Is he human or some kind of animated doll? Freaky. Also, does he wear make up? His morning routine would be longer than yours. We just don't know...He's also kind of like a clown. Yup. Although he DOES hang out with Tien, so he's got some cute friends going on, and since Tien is so cool, maybe there is something we failed to see in Chiaotzu that could be a total plus... maybe he's an awesome dancer, or tells really epic jokes, or maybe he just got some swag! We just don't know...

So to total up these points, we got:

Undateable:

1. Super creepy by staring a lot


2. we don't know what he is


3. he wears more make up than you (potentially)

Dateable:

1. Has cool friends so there is potential for something in him.... somewhere.... that maybe we haven't seen...

That's 3 to 1 my friends! He's your swagalicious chart!!

And now, sadly, our last topic of discussion this time.... the ever famous turtle hermit himself...Master Roshi.

We found Master Roshi to be UNDATEABLE.

Ew. I feel like there isn't much to be argued here...He's just a dirty old pervert. If he be near a female that he finds attractive, he will tell her....by touching her butt...or other parts of her body. No, thank you sir. That is just unacceptable! Also he's an old man. Which, for some, would be fine if he was rich, but he isn't. So keep those touchy-fingers to yourself. I suppose you could try to come up with some good qualities about Master Roshi, but not only are those really... REALLY hard to find, but we're also rather sleep deprived college students, so sorting through hundreds of episodes for a reputable act.... isn't on the top of our lists. I guess you could say he is... a good teacher... and kind of wise... but that doesn't really do much for the dating spectrum of his personality.

So let's tally this up for you:

Undateable:

1. pervert


2. super old dude


3. bad influence on students, and children in general...

Dateable:.....???

Aaaaaaaaaaaand the judges call it............. 3 to 0!!!! It's unanimous folks! Undateable! PIE CHART THAT SUCKER!!!!

And by all means, my cute little sausage links, if you find a good reason to date Master Roshi, we would LOVE to hear it. Seriously.

Tune in next time for the next exciting adventure in The Dateable Blog!!!!